Today was one of my good days. I felt a lot less gross and crampy than yesterday, and I got a bit more sleep than I’d been averaging over the last week (I resorted to sleeping tablets, though they were a different brand to what I’m used to and definitely not as potent. Still, they did the job enough for me to not feel like a zombie). As I said yesterday, I was willing to give myself a day off from exercise, so I skipped my morning walk.
I ate a healthy breakfast of weetbix and chia seeds with honey, which is fast becoming my favourite option for my first meal of the day as it is easier to prepare than eggs and healthier than toast. By the time lunchtime rolled around, I was in one of those weird moods where I’m kind of hungry but not enough to eat. This lasted well into the afternoon. I nibbed on some BBQ Shapes but wasn’t really into it, and put them away pretty quickly.
Thankfully my appetite came back for dinner, and I made up the rest of my daily calories then. I was feeling pretty good, the best I’d done in over 24 hours, and the weather outside was cooling down after another hot day as the sun was sinking. My dog was carrying on, obviously upset that I hadn’t taken her for her exercise, so I decided that I wasn’t going to skip it today after all.
It’s funny, even now I don’t really feel guilty when I eat the wrong thing (okay, maybe slightly, but nothing I can’t easily overlook), but when I think about skipping exercise – even for a legitimate reason – I can’t bring myself to do it. I wouldn’t say I enjoy it…not consciously, anyway. I hate feeling sore and sweaty and out of breath. I guess on a subconscious level, though, my body is enjoying the benefits of my new routine, and because of that, I feel really lazy and gross if I don’t make the effort and go. I remember feeling the same way when I started a gym routine a few years back…I’d just forgotten about that feeling up until now. It’s good that it’s happening, because if it wasn’t, I know for a fact I wouldn’t have made the effort tonight. Even with the guilt, I was still on the fence about it. What tipped me over was just how beautiful an evening it was. Daylight savings had finally kicked in, so it was getting darker later, and the air was still warm from the day, without the sun to make it unbearable. The sky was tinged with pink and the breeze was soft and welcoming. I walked a little slower than usual just to enjoy it a bit longer (and also because walking on a full stomach wasn’t the greatest life choice) and got home right at the sun was disappearing completely.
Despite the pretty night, I think I’ll try to go back to my morning routine tomorrow. Like I’ve mentioned previously, I think it’s best to get into the habit so when I start working full time again, it won’t be such an effort to go beforehand. Plus, as safe as my area seems, there’s always a lingering doubt about walking around as it’s getting dark. It’s a sad world when females have to think like that, even when there doesn’t appear to be any immediate danger.
Hope y’all had an awesome day too!