Time to Change – Day Fifteen

Today was another tough day.  I slept horribly (again, it seems to be becoming the norm…which isn’t totally uncommon), woke up hot and uncomfortable and it didn’t take long to work out it was that time of the month.

Urgh.

The first and second days are always pretty rough for me.  I get cramps, I’m grumpy, I’m perpetually tired (not helped by my shitty sleeping patterns of late) and I usually get pains elsewhere as well.  Now, as if this wasn’t bad enough, daylight savings kicked in at 3am.  While I love daylight savings and having the sun out for longer at night…I did not need to lose an hour in amongst all this.  Oh, and did I mention that I decided it was a fantastic idea to stay up til midnight last night?  For no reason?  Yeahhh.  My body clock refuses to let me sleep past 7am (it doesn’t seem to understand that I don’t need to get up for work any more), so I was up and moving at 8, thanks to daylight savings, but feeling like death.  Achingly tired and crampy and gross.

Today is going to be a skip-exercise day.

That’s what I initially planned, as I stumbled around my house in a sleep-deprived coma.  I jumped on the scales and saw something that shocked me back into reality – despite having a bad couple of days just 48 hours prior, I was back to where I was before that!  I was back on track!  How did that happen?  I’d put almost a kilo back on and now it was gone again.  I know hormones probably had a bit to play in it, and maybe I didn’t actually overeat as badly as I thought I’d done, but either way, the aches and pains seemed slightly more bearable.  Slightly.

I still wasn’t sure what I wanted to do.  I felt horrible.  When I get cramps, they aren’t just in my tummy, they radiate down my legs and into my back and just make me feel overall rundown and exhausted.  I knew it would be too hot to exercise later, and I also knew if I put it off until then it just wouldn’t happen.  So I made one of the toughest decisions of this journey so far – I got up off the oh-so-comfy couch, pulled on my shoes and walked.  My weight loss was more important than an hour of feeling sorry for myself.  The sun was warm (warmer than yesterday because I’d left later) but it was okay.  There was almost no wind, which was a nice change.

About halfway through the cramps came back with a vengeance.  It came in waves of pain, then nausea, then feeling faint.  There was nothing for it though, I was halfway and as far away from home as I could be.  I had to soldier on.  I knew I wasn’t going to die, so I just planted one foot in front of the other and imagined my soft, comfy couch that was waiting for me at the end of this torture.  I survived.  It was the toughest walk I’d been on by far, and realistically, giving myself a day off probably wouldn’t have been such a terrible idea, but I did it.  Another day I can successfully tick off.

I’ve spent most of the day dozing and reading.  It’s days like this I hate being a girl.  I’m just glad I didn’t have plans, because I don’t know if I’d have made it to them.  We’ll see how tomorrow goes.  If I’m feeling just as crappy, I probably won’t be exercising.  But we’ll wait and see 🙂

-JD